Random Quotes
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#399
15:18
26 March 2004 [+]
2
[-]
ircnet
#uknot
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15:15 -!- Rawr [^rawr@thunder.rawr.info] has joined #uknot
15:15 -!- mode/#uknot [+o Rawr] by Alasdair
15:17 <@Alasdair> just out of curiosity, where is rawr? I haven't seen him online much
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#805
13:27
06 June 2006 [+]
0
[-]
IRCNet
#uknot
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<fredead> WHY IS 98% of the people I work with completel fuck wits
<Ser_Olmy> you work in sales?
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#373
12:49
15 January 2004 [+]
0
[-]
oftc
#blug
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< davido02> bloddy win2k box is freezing :(
< ajg> warm it up a bit then
< pads> Yes, turn off the fans.
< pads> That'll warm it up no end.
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#6183
11:18
20 July 2009 [+]
0
[-]
ircnet
#dl-bar
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10:45:01 <@bgeek> morning cum buckets
10:48:42 <@Ser_Olmy> awight coqsucker
10:55:50 <@bgeek> that was the best Michael Barrymore impression i've seen on IRC
10:56:00 <@Ser_Olmy> thanks
10:56:05 <@bgeek> np
10:56:14 * Ser_Olmy bums the shit out of bgeek then drowns him in a swimming pool
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#560
23:21
06 June 2004 [+]
2
[-]
Evolnet
#gnaa
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<AlexDeLarge> LOL
<AlexDeLarge> 12:37:***: You are now known as sublimer
<AlexDeLarge> 3:06:subbie1: off my nick thanks
<lysol> haha
<lysol> tell him to eat a dick
<AlexDeLarge> 3:19:subbie1: thats my nick :) been using it for 8 years now..
<lysol> tell him it's about time he got a new one
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#929
11:45
26 April 2007 [+]
2
[-]
Netgoth
#orgy
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<denny> bored bored bored bored plank.
<locutus> bored with planck
<mst> too constant
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#1170
13:54
01 October 2007 [+]
0
[-]
freenode
#defocus
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<fred> Derogatory comment about your mother.
<fred> (the above comment intentionally does not specify a target to draw in as many people as possible)
<Jessicatz> witty response
<ZoFreX> literal description of typical reply to statement
<Vertelemming> Vain attempt to inject sanity and reason into the conversation. Sarcastic cat macro.
<Jessicatz> meta answer to implied metalevels of referration
<Jessicatz> angry threat to leave channel
<Vertelemming> Offhand note comparing current chat status to a community on popular online journalling system.
<denny> observation of similarity of current conversation to well known quote on popular website
<fred> denny: sarcastic statement of belief in coincidence.
<ZoFreX> threats of punishments to all participants thinly veiled as a constructive comment 8)
<Vertelemming> Ah, existential flame wars. Never leave me.
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#122
10:23
31 May 2003 [+]
27
[-]
ARCnet
#gas
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<Alan> Werdna dosnt have a birth certificate
<Alan> he has an apology letter from durex
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#5294
19:12
27 March 2008 [+]
4
[-]
jump
jump
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<@Phil> can anyone tell me what RIP is actually practically useful for ?
<@cpufreak> gravestones.
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#98
23:44
20 May 2003 [+]
-9
[-]
IRCnet
#dl-bar
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<stoat_> i nearly fell in a dead sheep once on the peaks
<Capaneus> 'in' !?
<will-h> eww
<stoat_> yeah i slipped up and stopped myself inches away from this fetid sheep
<will-h> was it rotting?
<stoat_> proper minging it was
<will-h> i saw a dead squirrel in the park yesterday
<Clive> Careful you'll arouse marq
<stoat_> right, picture the squirrel
<will-h> all laid out on it's back
<stoat_> and imagine about a thousand times more rotting flesh
<will-h> well, yeah
<will-h> i've seen them before
<will-h> try a cow
<stoat_> i think its the squirmy maggots that do it
<Clive> I nearly put my foot on a dead pidgeon in Soho on Sunday
* Capaneus changes topic to 'On now: "I've seen a bigger fetid corpse than you" On Later: More poo and fisting probably.'
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#312
01:08
18 November 2003 [+]
-3
[-]
Undernet
#cisco
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<NeoWatch> today we had a costumer who called to cancel her dial-up , when we asked why u wanna cancel she said , BECAUSE OF UR FUCKING INTERNET MY HUSBAND LEFT ME AND FOUND ANOTHER YOUNG GIRL
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#367
12:31
08 January 2004 [+]
-1
[-]
IRCnet
uknot
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<SlayerXP> people shouldn't be allowed to register domains for countries they can't point out on a map
<SlayerXP> that would work for football supporters too
<SlayerXP> manchester united would be fucked :)
<leicaWRK> hell most americans would lose their .coms
<SlayerXP> there's bound to be a downside though
<RyanOC> Less pr0n
<SlayerXP> i get pr0n from kazaa, not from the internet
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#694
18:49
23 March 2005 [+]
2
[-]
Undernet
#cisco
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<adama> wtf is he these days?
<Caveman> guess he goat tired of being called "son of goatse"
<Caveman> though i must say, goatse dont got shit on lemonparty.org
<de0> damnit
<Caveman> you didnt open lemonparty, did you?
<dogbert2> heh
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#168
13:25
02 July 2003 [+]
2
[-]
IRCnet
#uknot
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<SlayerXP> i'm rewriting Flanders and Swan's "Ill wind"
<SlayerXP> I once had a whim and I had to obey it,
<SlayerXP> To buy a fresh pie from grocery shop
<SlayerXP> I heated it up and I started to munch it,
<SlayerXP> In spite of the neighbours who begged me to stop.
<SlayerXP> To bake my pie,
<SlayerXP> I had to develop my cookery
<SlayerXP> I found my pie,
<SlayerXP> Was a bit of a devil to cut
<SlayerXP> So artfully formed,
<SlayerXP> To give you a taste,
<SlayerXP> A beautiful taste,
<SlayerXP> So rich and warmed.
<SlayerXP> Oh the hours I had to spend,
<SlayerXP> Before I mastered it in the end.
<SlayerXP> But that was yesterday.
<SlayerXP> And just today,
<SlayerXP> I looked in the usual place.
<SlayerXP> There was the box,
<SlayerXP> But the pie itself was missing!
<SlayerXP> Who swiped that pie?
<SlayerXP> I bet you a quid somebody did.
<SlayerXP> Knowing I found a recipe,
<SlayerXP> And wanted to try it,
<SlayerXP> Afraid of my talent at cooking the pie.
<SlayerXP> For early today to my utter dismay,
<SlayerXP> It had vanished away like the clouds in the sky
<SlayerXP> Oh where can it have gone?
<SlayerXP> Haven't you, hasn't anyone seen my pie?
<SlayerXP> Oh where can it have gone?
<SlayerXP> What a blow, now I know,
<SlayerXP> I'm unable to taste my meat gateaux
<SlayerXP> you sing it to the tune of Mozart Concerto K.495, movement III
* Rawr bans SlayerXP from taking any more drugs.
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#324
01:00
04 December 2003 [+]
-4
[-]
oftc
#blug
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00:59 * W1ZARD queues the warez and fades
00:59 < cpufreak> REDAF
00:59 < cpufreak> FADER
00:59 < W1ZARD> lol yup
00:59 < W1ZARD> but i beat wilson
00:59 < W1ZARD> so iam happy
01:00 < dw> did you?
01:00 < W1ZARD> [23:46] (W1ZARD): faderrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
01:00 < W1ZARD> [23:46] (W1ZARD): faaaaaaddddddddddddddderrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
01:00 < W1ZARD> [23:47] (W1ZARD): fadedaearrrrerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
01:00 < W1ZARD> nooooooo
01:00 < W1ZARD> you cunt
01:00 < W1ZARD> lol
01:00 < dw> hahaha#]
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#454
17:02
05 May 2004 [+]
-3
[-]
ircnet
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[IRCNet] -!- ERROR Closing Link: cpufreak[~andy@i.think.dns.is.pollut.ing.me.uk]
(Kill line active: dns pollution. read www.spamcalc.net/dnsspam.php and use
another host.)
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#253
14:29
08 August 2003 [+]
-4
[-]
Oz
Kidnapped
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<Bishi> i need a funny book for my holiday
<druid> you already have Mein Kampf, what else do you need
<Bishi> hehehe that would be pretty funny
<Bishi> go down first thing every morning and reserve a sunbed with Mein Kampf
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#250
10:45
07 August 2003 [+]
1
[-]
IRCnet
#uknot
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<jtb> i am struggling to motivate myself today
<SlayerXP> jtb: imagine a horny Neil McRae who's after your ass wearing BMW pyjamas
<SlayerXP> he's chasing you
<jtb> SlayerXP, you are sick
<SlayerXP> jtb: I'm not the one with McRae after my ass
<jtb> i dont want McRae and my arse will stay a virgin till the day i die thankyou
* jtb does the filing
<SlayerXP> he also has a bottle of daterape drugs in his jimjams pocket.
<SlayerXP> i'd put a packet of wetwipes in the fridge if I were you
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#5900
14:23
12 September 2008 [+]
1
[-]
ircnet
#uknot
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< Snafu> and thanks to my colleague over there <---
< Snafu> the cobalts due to be decomissioned are swearing at the nocite
< Snafu> 'FUCK YOU' on the lcd.
<@adama> make them say cool things like
<@adama> "i don't want to die"
<@adama> "please don't do it"
< Snafu> lol
< Snafu> "I have 5 raqs to feed :("
<@Ph1l> 'Core tempreature critical, Overload in 10....9....8'
<@wpf> "Insert coin to continue"
<@Ph1l> 'Help, I got shot by a laser and now I'm trapped in here with some loony named TRON...'
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#821
11:23
16 June 2006 [+]
2
[-]
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* Biddles sits on Enid's lap and watches the world go by
<Enid> the world must go by pretty quickly when you've been thrown out of the window
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