Random Quotes
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#374
14:51
15 January 2004 [+]
0
[-]
essex
essex
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14:50 < andy> alzimers society just called me to thank me for the donation I made to
them
14:50 < andy> I couldn't remember giving one :/
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#6008
17:04
15 January 2009 [+]
1
[-]
netgoth
orgy
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<@Speedwolf> Is Carl hot?
< kweilo> poitential for wankbank
<@Speedwolf> http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=hot+carl
<@syn> hahah
<@syn> hot carl
<@syn> icwudt
<@Speedwolf> thank you
<@tar0r0r> hahaha
< kweilo> I clicked
<@HauntedUnix> You came?
<@Speedwolf> he conquered
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#625
02:28
25 July 2004 [+]
-1
[-]
efnet
#setiathome
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<@badon> Yep, that's me.
<@badon> I'm pretty handsome for an IRC guy I think :)
<IsoGurl> *finally*.. been on irc 7 years and it's the first guy i've seen that i could handle seeing
<@badon> thanks...I think.
<IsoGurl> lol
<IsoGurl> meaning.. if that's u, its the first non-ugly guy i've seen on irc.. no.. first non-ugly guy i've seen on the net..
<@badon> So, will you marry me now?
<@badon> I hope I'm non-ugly enough for you.
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#880
20:38
05 January 2007 [+]
2
[-]
magnet
#perl
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<Shevek> Java is a programming langugae for grown ups. Perl is like mysql... it's fine until it breaks, and then you're fucked.
<buu> Awhhh, porr wittle shevek.
* buu pats Shevek on the head.
<Shevek> Case in point: I can't even find out the stack from Perl.
<buu> Shevek: That's so tragic.
<clintp> Shevek: Consider debugging then.
<buu> Shevek: Have you tried looking under the sofa?
<Shevek> clintp: I did, that's how I know it's in Email::MIME.
<avar> THE STACK IS UNDER THE SOFA
<clintp> Shevek: Sounds like you started debugging. Finish it!
<Shevek> That's the kind of place Perl would keep it. Makes hoovering faster, or something.
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#423
07:54
18 April 2004 [+]
4
[-]
Evolnet
#gnaa
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<h3n> sons of bitches.
<h3n> my whole life
<h3n> nothing but one giant warez search
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#141
04:01
11 June 2003 [+]
-6
[-]
Undernet
#censored
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<cyntax> the word mattress is filthy.
<cyntax> it never intends the correct practise
<dsp> mattress, should be depriciated, "love-cushion" maybe
<cyntax> yeah agreed
<cyntax> cushion is just as wroung
<dsp> mattress just brings to mind visions of big stains
<dsp> true
<dsp> "hymen-collecting device" ?
<cyntax> im sure i saw one at the new up and coming brisscos
<dsp> "pre-loved" ?
<cyntax> and, as for the blow up hymen-colletcing device.. the crime speaks for itself
<cyntax> absolutely revolting.
<dsp> i know you'd be first in the queue to buy one
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#845
19:42
17 August 2006 [+]
-2
[-]
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<bgeek> dvla want to charge an extra lb2.50 renew road tax online
<bgeek> fuck it, i work in town anyway so why waste 2.50 when i walk to a post office
<bgeek> do they think i'm fucking stupid
<bgeek> don't answer that
<InfraRed_> waste 30 mins queing at the postoffice instead
<InfraRed_> during your 20 mins lunch hour
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#6014
13:13
22 January 2009 [+]
-2
[-]
netgoth.org.uk
orgy
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<@syn> who would win in a rhyme fight
<@syn> obamas with katanas or babies with rabies
<@syn> (10 marks)
<@HauntedUnix> syn: Obamas with Katanas would bring the pain train. Babies with rabies would probably sit and shit.
<@Lemm> obamas with katanas, easily
<@IronNan> babaies with rabies just don't like water
<@syn> but if any babies with rabies got in his mouth
<@syn> they'd win the long victory
<@HauntedUnix> how would they get in his mouth?
<@HauntedUnix> also, you didn't rhyme your answer
<@HauntedUnix> hence losing the game
<@HauntedUnix> I mean points
<@HauntedUnix> I mean the game. I AM NOW BREATHING MANUALLY.
<@syn> hey kweilo
<@IronNan> are you saying Obama eats babies?
<@syn> HauntedUnix just lost the game
<@syn> just fyi
* Lemm switches off HauntedUnix's breathing.
<@Lemm> Lose THAT game, mofo
<@syn> IronNan: i'm just saying, if you were really hungry and the other option was a pot noodle, wouldn't you.
<@IronNan> dude, I'm vegan, I eat floor tiles
<@HauntedUnix> hahaha
<@Lemm> weaved floor tiles.
<@syn> good argument
<@HauntedUnix> IronNan: is that what Linz calls it?
<@syn> !addquote 13:07 <@IronNan> dude, I'm vegan, I eat floor tiles
<@IronNan> floor tiles, carpet, all the same
<@syn> what about when the carpet's being painted
<@syn> surely that's carnivorous
<@Speedwolf> that's cannibalism I think
<@Lemm> there's an egg in there somewhere
<@Speedwolf> depends on if you get a lump or not
<@Lemm> SOYLENT RED
<@syn> Lemm++
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#253
14:29
08 August 2003 [+]
-4
[-]
Oz
Kidnapped
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<Bishi> i need a funny book for my holiday
<druid> you already have Mein Kampf, what else do you need
<Bishi> hehehe that would be pretty funny
<Bishi> go down first thing every morning and reserve a sunbed with Mein Kampf
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#62
11:15
02 May 2003 [+]
-16
[-]
IRCnet
#uknot
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<merl> dude
<merl> yuck
<merl> gross
<merl> wrong
<merl> nasty
<merl> dirty
<merl> EWWWW
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#788
09:31
18 November 2005 [+]
0
[-]
Quakenet
#lipex
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<@^i^> haha, awesome. I just found a site witha form on and I submitted it blank
<@^i^> it promptly sent me to http://www.google.co.uk/search?q=internet+for+dummies
<@^i^> I dont know what it is about me that cant resist pressing te submit button on empty forms just to see what happens :p
<@^i^> wow, my typing has gone from passable to asshat in ten minutes. novel.
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#607
11:53
08 July 2004 [+]
1
[-]
ircnet
uknot
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<@Ser_Olmy_> r
<@leicaWRK> r
<@jtb> r
<@cpufreak> r
<@Ser_Olmy_> ahhh nothing more satisfying than a screenfull of r's
<@Ser_Olmy_> except perhaps sex on coke
<@leicaWRK> doesn't the can jab your back pretty hard?
<@Ser_Olmy_> nah i use a bottle, with a wide neck
<@Footle> there are things more satisfying than sex on coke
<@jtb> and vasoline
<@Footle> even if you use the bottle
<@cpufreak> such as?
<@Ser_Olmy_> r, please offer suggestions
<@Ser_Olmy_> sex on crack i guess?
<@Footle> euuw
* Footle shrugs
<@jtb> 130mph airborn wheelies on me 996 are pretty satisfying
<@Footle> sex on coke and biscuits?
<@jtb> bourbons?
<@winjer> sex on kebabs
<@Ser_Olmy_> mmm sex on coke in a bath of chocolate
<@Footle> ser: you're straying into evilmarq territory there
<@Ser_Olmy_> ! surely not
<@Ser_Olmy_> that would be sex on coke in a bath of nails while choir boys ram dildo's into my ass
-!- jtb changed the topic of #uknot to: <Ser_Olmy_> that would be sex on coke in a bath of nails while choir boys ram dildo's into my ass
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#671
20:54
15 December 2004 [+]
-2
[-]
#18-30
Letsbounce
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<adam> did i tell you about my cousin?
<adam> i think that was yr 1 at first school
<adam> :D
<adam> i used to chase her around the floor trying to kiss0rize her :P
<adam> poor cousin :\
<adam> she's a lesbian now.
<Aurelia> incest made her lesbian
<adam> i think she's the only girlie i've tried to kiss who's turned into one.
<adam> as far as i know.
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#31
18:00
25 April 2003 [+]
17
[-]
ArcNET
#worms
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<C> l22r
<C> er. l33t.
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#432
10:22
27 April 2004 [+]
-2
[-]
ircnet
#dl-bar
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* tom_ mounts mally
<@InfraRed_> mount /dev/mally /mnt/storage/pr0n
<@tom_> 'device too gay'
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#53
02:51
28 April 2003 [+]
-2
[-]
ArcNET
#gas
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<_Elf_> I got laid at the side of a motorway at 15 8-D
<pressure> in the bushes ;)
<_Elf_> drunk :O
<steve-o^> how romantic
<pressure> was it the to patrolman ;)
<steve-o^> I lost my virginity to a minging wanker
<pressure> madame Palm took mine :(
<_Elf_> some hooker? ;)
<pressure> yes, i was gang raped by her and her five daughters
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#659
22:01
16 September 2004 [+]
-1
[-]
IRCnet
#uknot
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<Alasdair> I burned my record of achievement
<Alasdair> (on purpose)
* adama burns alasdair
<adama> (on purpose)
* Alasdair shows off his new scar from adama's burning
<Alasdair> ain't it cool? i is hard i is
<adama> i didn't mean that kind of burning
<adama> i meant stephen hawking in a house fire kind of burning
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#713
22:33
13 April 2005 [+]
0
[-]
OFTC
#offtopic
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<AlexG> DannyB: Yo' mama so fat, she runs on 32 and 64 bit systems.
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#763
15:31
16 September 2005 [+]
-2
[-]
Blitzed
#blitzed
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<strtok> im unemployed
<strtok> ph33r
<leE> I ph34r j00r j0bs33k3r5 /-|_|_0///-||(3 !
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