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#42 07:10 27 April 2003 [+] -1 [-] IRCnet #uknot
* kurai wanders off to watch Solaris
<kurai> (The Solyaris/Lem remake, not the OS, you understand)
<kurai> hrmmm.
<kurai> It's only really in places like #UKNot that I would feel the need to explain that ;-)
#291 20:45 22 September 2003 [+] 1 [-] IRCnet #uknot
<christel> Howcome is it you can sue mcdonalds if you become fat, sue marlboro if you get cancer, but you cant sue breweries for all the ugly people you shag?
#677 03:00 01 January 2005 [+] 1 [-] IRCnet #uknot
<adama> Subject: Cron <root@markus>    /root/scripts/update-mirrors.sh >>
<adama> Date: Sat, 01 Jan 2005 02:49:29 +0000
<adama> woo
<adama> first email of 2005
<adama> and it's from a cunting shell script
<adama> typical
#311 19:49 17 November 2003 [+] 33 [-] IRCnet #uknot
<RyanOC> Can anyone here *quickly* get me some 'net bandwith w/BGP at City Reach, Docklands? (Over Ethernet)
<adama> not over gas?
<adama> IPoverGas is thenextbigthing(tm)
<cenhinen> Ketchup Over MPLS
<scroteman> bluetooth over bluecheese
<jtb> brown sauce over saussage
<scroteman> this is getting ridiculous
<scroteman> neither brown sauce nor sausage is a protocol
<jtb> yes it is
<jtb> its a protocol for making my taste buds happy
<scroteman> and the RFC number is what?
<jtb> hmmm, i maybe ought to write one :)
<jtb> it would however require considerable research
<jtb> \o/
#61 11:14 02 May 2003 [+] 39 [-] IRCnet #uknot
<merl> I am totally unprejudiced about homosexuality
<merl> BUT ITS STILL YUCKY!!!
#5893 10:10 01 August 2008 [+] -3 [-] netgoth orgy
< ryll> it probably should occur to me to have more of an acceptable behaviour filter at work
< ryll> so I don't do things like I did this morning
< ryll> the guy sitting next to me and I both had box cutters in our hands, slashing them about wildly and screaming "SSSTAB!" "STABSTAB!" at one another.
<@BurritoB> that's only inappropriate if you also had teatowels on your head
<@BurritoB> and claimed to be "Sheiks on a Plane"
#407 10:59 19 March 2004 [+] -3 [-] IRCnet #uknot
<Radix> I am not happy with the level of gayness I'm seeing here
<Skywalker> start up the gayometer
<-- SlayerXP has kicked Radix from #uknot (Gayness reduction kick)
<Skywalker> lol
<SlayerXP> there we go
<SlayerXP> less gay already
#166 19:07 26 June 2003 [+] 0 [-] IRCNet #UKNOT
<@paule> grow a huge beard, wear a towel on your head and call yourself Bob Laden
<@cpufreak> or Bob Ian Norman Laden

#113 10:58 29 May 2003 [+] -3 [-] IRCNet #uknot
<@will-h> job centres contain gasses to kill off the unemployed after a while

#1215 12:45 11 October 2007 [+] -1 [-] Netgoth #orgy
<denny> has anyone figured out what the hell people are doing when they 'take sexy back' from you on facebook?
<denny> I mean, is that an insult, a come-on, or what?
<Speedwolf> I thin kit's an insult
<denny> I was mostly assuming insult, but some people seem to be using it as a flirting tool
<Speedwolf> thin kit == emergency diet aid, contains wadded paper for eating and tapework eggs
<Speedwolf> s/k/m
<denny> SPAZHANDS!
<denny> \\\\o////
<Speedwolf> all spaz, not just the nads
<Speedwolf> s/nads/hands
<Speedwolf> how the hell did that happen?
<denny> lol?
* Speedwolf is now known as Spaznads
#313 22:52 21 November 2003 [+] -1 [-] Undernet Censored
<bx> spak
<bx> ur gay too
<spak> no
<spak> im just hetrosexually challenged
#205 15:39 16 July 2003 [+] -2 [-] IRCnet #uknot
<Rawr>  ______
<Rawr> < moo? >
<Rawr>  ------
<Rawr>         \   ^__^
<Rawr>          \  (oo)\_______
<Rawr>             (__)\       )\/\
<Rawr>                 ||----w |
<Rawr>                 ||     ||
<scrotewrk> ahh - the common "double-tail-hinge" breed of cow
#127 21:17 05 June 2003 [+] 0 [-] ArcNET #worms
<C> bah
<C> changing dump2 to /hotspare was a bad idea
<C> cd /ho<tab><tab><tab><tab>
<C> "goddamnit"
#281 16:19 11 September 2003 [+] 1 [-] letsbounce #18-30
<rik> i love the belief system.
<rik> when they see magical things, they believe in you a little more.
<rik> if they see a large, house-sized rock flying over the village, that inspires belief
<rik> if they see corpses dropped through the roof of the nursery, that inspires a lof of belief.
#5039 11:18 04 March 2008 [+] 4 [-] MAGnet #london.pm
<gbjk> Dog and duck chucked us out at 7.30 on saturday!
<gbjk> In the middle of our deserts.
<gbjk> "Sorry, we've got a private function"
<teejay> eep
<Penfold> gbjk: there's gotta be a Java or C++ gag in there somewhere?
<teejay> did they not tell you before you sat down ?
<teejay> that's minimal professionalism
<Penfold> teejay: no, of course not. why would you expose a private member function outside your class? :)
<teejay> *sigh*
<Penfold> I'll get my coat.
#268 14:55 27 August 2003 [+] -1 [-] Undernet #cisco
* darkelf_ goes off to get coffee and unhook phone
<ob0t> hmm
<ob0t> caffeine
<ob0t> good idea
<ob0t> make me all jittery
<ob0t> then
<ob0t> STABBY STABBY
#164 19:06 26 June 2003 [+] -30 [-] IRCNet #uknot
<@Ser_Olmy_> all these new airport security checks are bollox(tm)
<@Ser_Olmy_> Miami xrays _all_ baggage, both hand and checked.  so they xray my case, and the guy opens it to check it (i had a micropc and other small electronic devices in it)
<@Ser_Olmy_> inside, apart from the collection of geeky things, is a large sealed jiffy bag.  he just picks it up, shakes it, and puts it back in.  then spends 5 minutes looking at the micropc
<@Ser_Olmy_> it's a SEALED JIFFY BAG
<@Ser_Olmy_> with somebody elses name on it!
<@Ser_Olmy_> i.e. not mine
<@adem> with drug dog barking loudly behind?
<@Ser_Olmy_> no ;)
<@Ser_Olmy_> the grass smell had disippated since leaving my flat the day before ;)
#875 12:36 12 December 2006 [+] -1 [-] Freenode #linpeople
* Jymmmm (n=Jymmmm@unaffiliated/jymmm) has joined #linpeople
<Jymmmm> Any suggestions for penetration testing?
<Zombie> Invite a few friends over.
* Jymmmm has quit ()
#1 03:59 22 April 2003 [+] 10 [-] IRCnet #uknot
<Biddle> Oh, and the other really funny thing
<Biddle> A (rather nicely done up) Golf GTi full of 4 townie cunts took off from us out of the car park like a twat - ran a red light (saw the flash, so that was 3 points there) and him zooming off up the road (new forward-facing camera, no flash, another 3 points)
<Biddle> We pootled along at 30mph and three sets of traffic lights later, found him embedded in a wall :)
<Ser_Olmy> !
<scroteman> Shite
<Biddle> Couldn't be arsed stopping
<Ser_Olmy> hahahaha
<Ser_Olmy> not even to laugh?
<Ser_Olmy> in their bloodied faces
<Biddle> Nah, we might have to help then
#64 11:41 02 May 2003 [+] 4 [-] IRCnet #uknot
[11:40] <CapnB> We're getting Oliver debagged next Friday.
[11:40] <CapnB> I'm thinking about ebaying his testicles.
[11:40] <adem> !!!
[11:40] <CapnB> he's full of catspunk, and the cat next door knows this :)

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