ircquote.org

Home Latest Top 20 Random Submit Search
Q#

Random Quotes

#90 23:47 14 May 2003 [+] -4 [-] IRCnet #uknot
* christel shows you all her penis
<christel> oh wait
<christel> i dont have one
* christel has a glass of wine instead
#1426 12:23 19 October 2007 [+] 0 [-] freenode #defocus
<chrisbrl88> beef jerkey rules
<Davo_Dinkum> Beef jerkey has no leadership skills whatsoever
<Armand> although it does give +5 con. :P
#269 15:33 27 August 2003 [+] -1 [-] oz.org #zgeek
<sagit> * notes an increase in boredom
<iaidoka> omg.. i increase boredom level ?
<iaidoka> im like a bad adnd item.. "cursed +20% boredom"
<iaidoka> mmmmm... makes me think of ADOM
* iaidoka is a little obsessed
<iaidoka> OMG check this out, ultimate willpower.  there is a block of lint chocolate in the kitchen, and i havnt eaten it all
* iaidoka flexes
<Bishi> no. real willpower is the fact that there are a plethora of easy-to use hacking tools on the internet, and you're not sitting at a BSOD
#502 13:12 23 May 2004 [+] 1 [-]
< barn> gah!
< barn> damn you screen!
< tesuji> heh
< barn> pressing ctrl-a then s is a bad idea (don't try it)
< cenhinen> but i have to now
* tesuji is tempted as well
< cenhinen> nothing happened
< cenhinen> \o/ it's raining now
< tesuji> you can make it rain by pressing that key combo ?
< cenhinen> apparently
< cenhinen> no wonder barn didn't want me to type it :(

#816 02:15 09 June 2006 [+] -1 [-]
Ci-Dev [n=ci-dev@p54BDF172.dip.t-dialin.net] has quit ["Ah, IRC, where men are men, women are men, and 14-year old girls are FBI agents."]
#327 23:09 05 December 2003 [+] 1 [-] Undernet Censored
<kaps> Why was Heisenberg's wife unsatisfied?
<kaps> When he had the time he didn't have the energy, and when he had the position, he didn't have the momentum.
#146 14:46 13 June 2003 [+] -1 [-] Freenode #debian
<Eatshes_> and whitch system ntfs oder fat 32 ?
<SlayerXP> Eatshes_: take the cotton wool out of your mouth, I can't understand you.
#552 00:43 02 June 2004 [+] 1 [-] Evolnet #gnaa
<lysol> anyone got a good nonviolent use for a 233mhz machine?
<penisbird> doorstop
<Geoffd1> dedicated ping flood server
#954 18:28 27 June 2007 [+] 0 [-] irc.perl.org #london.pm
<@adam> evdb: you vote for your local MP, not the Prime Minister
<@wethrin> I didn't vote for my MP. Some other bastards outvoted me.
#783 20:02 21 October 2005 [+] -4 [-] TBW TBW
Nocashvalue: O RLY?
Phreeck: O RLY?
Nocashvalue: YA RLY
Phreeck: OOO RLY?
Nocashvalue: MEBY RLY
Phreeck: HONESTLY RLY??
Nocashvalue: NO LEIS RLY
Nocashvalue: RLY RLY
Phreeck: O RLY RLY RLY?
Nocashvalue: YA RLY RLY
Phreeck: KWL!
Nocashvalue: YA
Nocashvalue: RLY KWL
#274 14:46 02 September 2003 [+] 31 [-] IRCnet #rar
<Skywalker> hmm
<Skywalker> a friend of mine has a 15yo boyfriend and he easked my advice
<Skywalker> so I told him to buy a house with deep cellars
<Skywalker> now he's not talking to me
<Skywalker> strange
#805 13:27 06 June 2006 [+] 0 [-] IRCNet #uknot
<fredead> WHY IS 98% of the people I work with completel fuck wits
<Ser_Olmy> you work in sales?
#614 04:10 11 July 2004 [+] -4 [-] efnet #hamradio2
<Drac0nic> yes, the world is conspiring against me because I'm the sane one
<@badon> so the whole world is on your list?
<Drac0nic> not the whole world, I'd say many politicians and half the county or so, maybe a few small nations
<@badon> Man, I don't think nuclear weapons is going to do it - What you need are like 5 or 6 REALLY slutty girls with AIDS, that ought to kill everyone.
#180 12:50 07 July 2003 [+] -6 [-] IRCnet #uknot
<FreG> yup
<FreG> reminds me of a call we got at work
<StilFari> which one?
<FreG> someone said her screen had stripes on it
<FreG> then she found the "problem"
<StilFari> o_O
<FreG> her computer was fine...but the "box" next to it didnt have any lights on
<StilFari> huh?
<FreG> her computer = her monitor
<StilFari> box?
<FreG> yeah...the computer case was a box next to her "computer"
<StilFari> mmmmh, i m not sure i get it
<FreG> she considers her monitor/screen to be the computer
<StilFari> ok
<FreG> and prolly sees the computer case as a box to put lil statuettes on
<StilFari> oki
<FreG> so all she had to do was press the power button
#565 10:59 10 June 2004 [+] 0 [-] freenode #debian
<beastmaster> what server type do i need for hotmail?
#6231 23:17 03 March 2010 [+] -10 [-] Efnet #php
<Two9A> Slashdot has a good analogy. "C/C++ coders are tank commanders: close to the action, in deep. PHP is like a UCAV pilot: much the same firepower, but sitting in a comfy chair with coffee to hand. Python is an F-22 pilot: in the arena, but removed from the ground."
<Two9A> Any additions?
<haro> php is more like anti-satellite warfare, it's good for aiming at the stars but only leaves a mess of debris in its' wake
#859 05:58 11 October 2006 [+] -1 [-] ircnet #pascal
Cheesey about why he feels sorry for the PHP programmer who would take over
his project in the future:
<cheesey> and then has comments like
<cheesey> // Ferdinand de Saussure would be rolling in his grave. Maybe we could hook him up
<cheesey> // to some kind of dynamo and use him as a  power source as a backup to the
<cheesey> // UPS systems.  SNMP-manageable linguists are a major gap in the market.

#1025 13:18 31 July 2007 [+] -1 [-] Netgoth #orgy
<HauntedUnix> BurritoB: Anywhere decent + near to get food?
<BurritoB> I have only really spent about a week in this office (and often get stuck working lunch), so I haven't sussed out the food situation much.
<Fox> HauntedUnix: pret
<BurritoB> but yeah, pret is an edible default, and the japanese place just left out of the office isn't bad
<syn> EAT > pret
<syn> EAT.owner() does not return McDonalds
<Fox> eat are fascists
<syn> your mum's a fascist
<denny> 'fascist' does not mean 'likes it in the face'
<syn> oh
#6241 17:18 23 March 2010 [+] -2 [-]
(01:11:57 PM) B-Man: You know it's an interesting IM conversation when you read "fuck the titties, I rammed it up her popper too many times to count"
(01:12:24 PM) B-Man: And for all you living vicariously, I believe he meant 'pooper'.
(01:14:32 PM) lobbysog: oh. I was hoping he was ramming something into her jalapeņo popper.
(01:15:51 PM) B-Man: Well, if wishes were horses...
(01:16:01 PM) B-Man: Then we'd all have poppers to ram.
(01:16:12 PM) lobbysog: also, we'd have an abundance of glue.
#768 09:11 23 September 2005 [+] -1 [-] freenode #classiccmp
* toresbe puts pizza into oven
< toresbe> tore@fortran:~$ sleep 10m; beep; beep; beep; beep; beep; beep;
                 beep; beep; beep; beep; beep; beep; beep; beep; beep; beep;

[ 872 Quotes Accepted ] [ 2 Quotes Pending ] [ 5398 Quotes Rejected ] [ 2597601 Hits ]